Once a man walks through the doors of a prison, and they close behind him, it has to affect him.
It doesn't matter if he's done time before on a previous charge, but especially if he is a "new jack" like I was, the experience has a psychological impact. Imprisonment is not a natural thing for anyone. This is not a normal environment by any means. Even experts in the field of psychology say that arrest and incarceration is one of the top ten heavy-duty stresses in life, along with the death of a loved one or the loss of a job.
I cannot remember if I heard this term somewhere, the "Emotional Cycles of Incarceration," or if I coined it myself. I'm not a big fan of psychology, but for want of a better way to put it, prison is like a roller coaster ride of different emotions which can come and go as one does his time, be it a sentence of five years, or fifty.
I would also describe it as a period of prolonged trauma. Even on good days, prison can be stressful. There are always varying degrees of tension along with its partner, apprehension. Some days these two may be intensely felt, while on other days only a little. But they never go away. Like the weather, one day it's calm, the next a storm is brewing.
I would list these cycles as follows:
Disbelief
Denial
Anger (directed at others)
Acceptance (of one's circumstances)
Taking Responsibility (for one's criminal acts)
Moving on (with life)
Frankly, I've experienced them all. At the start of my incarceration, they went exactly in this order. However, as time went on they would come and go at different times, but not necessarily in the same order.
Initially, I began to experience disbelief. "What am I doing here?" "How did this happen?" It all seemed surreal. I would ask myself over and over, "What happened to the life I had hoped for?" I saved up a decent amount of money while I was in the Army. I wanted to get a good job, get married, move into a nice neighborhood and raise a family. Now it's all gone!
Next would come the others.
D.B.
I cannot remember if I heard this term somewhere, the "Emotional Cycles of Incarceration," or if I coined it myself. I'm not a big fan of psychology, but for want of a better way to put it, prison is like a roller coaster ride of different emotions which can come and go as one does his time, be it a sentence of five years, or fifty.
I would also describe it as a period of prolonged trauma. Even on good days, prison can be stressful. There are always varying degrees of tension along with its partner, apprehension. Some days these two may be intensely felt, while on other days only a little. But they never go away. Like the weather, one day it's calm, the next a storm is brewing.
I would list these cycles as follows:
Disbelief
Denial
Anger (directed at others)
Acceptance (of one's circumstances)
Taking Responsibility (for one's criminal acts)
Moving on (with life)
Frankly, I've experienced them all. At the start of my incarceration, they went exactly in this order. However, as time went on they would come and go at different times, but not necessarily in the same order.
Initially, I began to experience disbelief. "What am I doing here?" "How did this happen?" It all seemed surreal. I would ask myself over and over, "What happened to the life I had hoped for?" I saved up a decent amount of money while I was in the Army. I wanted to get a good job, get married, move into a nice neighborhood and raise a family. Now it's all gone!
Next would come the others.
D.B.