What was my first night in Attica like?
I don't remember. But I doubt I slept well. Stress and an uncomfortable mattress and pillow probably didn't make for a restful sleep. Neither did the guards walking up and down the tier with their flashlights shining in my face help matters. When I did finally get to sleep it was likely the result of mental and physical exhaustion.
The next day, however, I got to meet my neighbors. These were the men who lived on the same tier as me. I was fortunate and even a little surprised that they were friendly and helpful. As was the usual custom of living in a prison community, the "old timers," men who've already been locked up for a long time, would usually introduce themselves to a newcomer in order to school him on the do's and don'ts of prison.
Several kind old timers told me that the way to survive incarceration in a place like Attica was to "lay low, keep your mouth shut, and mind your own business." Good advice, but I still needed my shank and it was always close by. In Attica one could never take a chance. Convicts were always getting cut and stabbed, and I eventually got cut as well. It was part of the learning experience that would come later on.
Within a few days I was cleared by security and was able to come out of my cell and mingle with everyone. Some guys liked me, and some did not. But we all interacted together because we had to. I had some scuffles, but they were minor events.
Nevertheless, prison life was a challenge. My mind, looking back from where I'm at today, was not like it is now. Like every new felon who comes into the system, especially for the first time, there is what I would call the "Emotional Cycles of Incarceration."
This is a recurring process of adaptation that a man will go through no matter what. I hope to share more on this in my next entry.
D. B.
The next day, however, I got to meet my neighbors. These were the men who lived on the same tier as me. I was fortunate and even a little surprised that they were friendly and helpful. As was the usual custom of living in a prison community, the "old timers," men who've already been locked up for a long time, would usually introduce themselves to a newcomer in order to school him on the do's and don'ts of prison.
Several kind old timers told me that the way to survive incarceration in a place like Attica was to "lay low, keep your mouth shut, and mind your own business." Good advice, but I still needed my shank and it was always close by. In Attica one could never take a chance. Convicts were always getting cut and stabbed, and I eventually got cut as well. It was part of the learning experience that would come later on.
Within a few days I was cleared by security and was able to come out of my cell and mingle with everyone. Some guys liked me, and some did not. But we all interacted together because we had to. I had some scuffles, but they were minor events.
Nevertheless, prison life was a challenge. My mind, looking back from where I'm at today, was not like it is now. Like every new felon who comes into the system, especially for the first time, there is what I would call the "Emotional Cycles of Incarceration."
This is a recurring process of adaptation that a man will go through no matter what. I hope to share more on this in my next entry.
D. B.
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