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AriseandShine.org

January 2011

Bipolar Blues

1/20/2011

 
Both at the Intermediate Care Program where I work on weekday afternoons, and in the prion's general population where I reside, I will sometimes encounter other prisoners who are, in my observation, clearly suffering from what is known as "Bipolar Disorder..."
They will exhibit periods of extreme energy with outbursts of creativity. They will talk fast, and their words will be spoken louder than normal, too. It's very noticeable. I could liken them to machines that got shifted into high gear.

But when I would see these guys a few days later, they'd be downcast and despondent manifesting the obvious signs of depression. Their energy will be at a low ebb. I'd see them moping along with slouched shoulders and heads hung down, and sad expressions on each face. I'd see another personality being displayed altogether.

This is not to be taken as negative criticism, however. For I too have my own struggles and days when prison life will get the best of me. In fact everyone, be they incarcerated or not, experiences occasional periods of sadness or difficult days. This is normal. But in the correctional setting such changes in one's behavior becomes more noticeable.

Actually living in prison can become a lesson in psychology as well. In here one can observe a wide array of different personalities coming from a broad range of differing backgrounds. But as a Christian I want to see my peers with the eyes of Jesus. In other words, I want to see things from a spiritual perspective, and not merely from a psychological one.

If I was to use only my own eyes, I would see the obvious displays of anger, bitterness, loneliness and fear - all common components for many of those who are confined. And some will also exhibit various self-destructive and self-sabotaging behavior patterns, too. They'll appear to have a penchant for bringing more pain and suffering as a result of getting arrested and sentenced to a term in prison in the first place. It's a strange pattern of adding pain on top of pain. It is as if each one has been programmed to fail; this is sad.

While at the opposite end are those prisoners who, although locked up, somehow manage to remain positive and goal oriented. They strive to make something good out of their lives, while still others will vacillate between both extremes. For example, and inmate will be enrolled in an educational program and is doing good, when suddenly he commits a serious infraction of prison rules and ends up in what is benignly called the "Special Housing Unit" by prison official; inmates know it as "The Box." I've often witnessed such behavioral derailments.

Nevertheless, as a Christian I try to tell these guys that God doesn't want them to lead unhappy, unproductive or self-destructive lives. Rather God wants them to know that salvation and forgiveness is available to everyone through the death of Jesus Christ on the cross. And for those who choose to come to Christ, God offers them a new life and a new beginning, and real hope.

D.B.

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    David Berkowitz
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