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AriseandShine.org

February 2023

Hiding My Tears

2/8/2023

 
My tears have been my meat day and night, while 
they continually say unto me, Where is thy God?
Psalm 42:3

For the most part, men are good at hiding their wounds and their pain… 

But we are especially good at hiding our tears. This is certainly true in prison. In this environment, crying is equated with weakness. Tears are frowned upon. You may be seen by some of your peers as being less than a man. 

The only exception to this is with the death of a loved one. Should a man lose a family member, be it a parent, a child, or a wife, one good cry is okay. But after that it's "Shame on you." It's unfair, I know. It's downright ridiculous. But prison is where the classic "macho man" image rules. To show anything less is to possibly invite verbal abuse upon oneself, and be looked upon as being "soft."

To be labeled by your peers as being weak or soft could open a man to becoming the victim of bullying. So one learns to cry in secret. Alone in one's cell is the best place to shed tears. And in all frankness, I do a lot of crying. 

I carry a lot of emotional pain. However, I think I carry it well. I'm good at hiding my tears, which I'm okay with. But I can definitely relate to King David's words as he penned in a Psalm, "I am weary with my groaning; all the night I make my bed to swim; I water my couch with tears" (Psalm 6:6).

I can definitely relate to David. He knew the value of tears. Sadly, today we have what I believe is a flawed view of crying. After all, when God created man and woman, He gave us tear ducts. So we were built to cry whenever we felt we need to. Even Jesus cried, as the shortest verse in the holy Bible succinctly states in John's gospel account, "Jesus wept" (John 11:35).

Nothing makes it more clear than what the Scriptures themselves reveal about tears. The brave King David, who slew the giant Goliath and won countless battles that involved hand-to-hand combat, cried often. And so did the Lord Jesus. He wept over his friend Lazarus's grave. And He wept bitter tears over His beloved Jerusalem, as well. 

If a king and gallant military commander can cry, and if the One known as the King of all kings can cry, then so can I. And my tears are not falling unnoticed. God is collecting them. They're being stored in bottles. "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in Your bottle. You have recorded each one in Your book" (Psalm 56:8).

Imagine that!


D. B.

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    David Berkowitz
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