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AriseandShine.org

August 2010

Battle Fatigue/Part 2

8/19/2010

 
And let us not be weary in
well doing: for in due season
we shall reap, if we faint not. 
Galatians 6:9


I'd like to continue with what I was discussing yesterday. In relation to battle fatigue... 
...last night, I had the desire to confess to the Lord (within the privacy of my prison cell) that I have been somewhat disappointed and bitter about a certain matter. As the regular readers of my journal know, I've been wanting to leave the position as my congregation's worship leader for a couple of years. And there were times when I thought for sure that everything was arranged and my replacement was ready to step to the pulpit and take over. But this has yet to happen. Yes, there were moments when I thought, "Now!" But, like a mirage in the desert, "Poof!" Nothing.

I still believe, however, that the man whom I would like to see installed as inmate pastor and worship leader is thoroughly qualified. He would make a good leader, and he is a good example to the flock as to how a Christian should live. But for whatever reasons, he has wavered when it comes to taking the final step. Now, too, my hopes for change have dimmed even further because I see that he's also suffering from battle fatigue like I am. It's obvious by looking at his countenance. He's exhausted and battle weary. We're both in need of a prolonged period of spiritual, physical, and emotional rest.

No doubt, I would love a sabbatical. Maybe months of recuperation and a season for me to be refreshed in the Lord. But for now such a thing is not possible. So, by faith, I stumble forward, trusting in God that better days are coming. I also asked the Lord to remove from my heart any roots of bitterness, and for me to learn to be content in whatever circumstances I am in.

D.B.

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